I came home Saturday morning and went to a neighbors sons baby shower, and then Issy went over to Amy's for a slumber party! Makaila went to a football game with her friends and I relaxed at home while Danny was at work. The football game did not go as planned for Makaila as she had to face the harsh reality of life and accept that sometimes the people we love the most will hurt us the worst. I felt horrible for my baby because a friend betrayed her and there was nothing I could do to stop it. As a mom we want our kids to feel joy and happiness and safety and trust...and when one of those is compromised we get defensive and vengeful...but there is really nothing we can do because these things are a part of life...but I will admit seeing her hurt, hurt me more than she will ever know. I still remember my broken friendships in high school and the heartaches that followed and I only hope and pray that she is strong enough to overcome all of them because there will be plenty of that in her future!
Sunday we went to church, and it was EPIC weekend...we had a blast..the girls rode carnival rides, ate snow cones, etc. We went home so Danny and Makaila could watch the game and we ate pizza. By the afternoon Issy was bored so we went back up to the church and rode rides over and over and over again! We enjoyed that carnival and all the church festivities until well into the night! I love our church and the impact it has on our family and our community!! I am so proud of that!
We also hit up a birthday party for one of Danny's new co-workers daughters....Issy had a great time!
On Thursday October 15th, I got a call from my cousin Norma that my grandpa Matt was in the hospital in Dallas and he was probably not going to make it. She told me of his medical status and that I should check on my dad to make sure he was okay....that lead to a very frustrating conversation with my dad in which he acted like it was no big deal and we could go see him over the weekend., etc...
Instead I left work, drove home, packed a bag and picked my dad up on the way to Dallas to see my grandpa. I talked to each of my sisters on the way and by night fall we were all together in a hospital in Dallas! Grandpa wasn't looking so good at all and I was grateful to have the flexibility to be there and to have us all there with my dad. The girls were with Danny and I was right where God wanted me to be. Great things happened the next day because I was able to get my dad and Aunt Vicky to reconcile after a LONG 11 yr period of them not speaking to each other and acting like a pair of fools. Life is too short and precious to hold grudges and let your pride cost you relationships!!
That Friday we stayed at the hospital all day and evening, and at 8 pm, we headed back to my parents, but right after we passed Ennis, Norma called again and let me know that grandpa was bleeding really bad and we needed to come back. We sent mom and Nancy and her family home, and Dad and I turned back to the hospital. turned out the breathing tubes he had in place over the last few days dried out all his nasal cavities and his throat and he was having heavy bleeding sessions, but by the time we got there it had stopped and grandpa was very irritated. Dad decided to stay the night in the hospital with him and Tia Vicky again, just to be safe. It was a long restless night with him constantly trying to take off his new breathing mask, and arguing, and telling us he wanted to die, that he was tired and he was just so angry...it hurt my heart so much. I was torn as were Tia Vicky and my dad. We never let him take it off for too long, and we all stayed up with him all night long. I think I finally took a little cat nap at about 6 am! Morning came and more visitors showed up and finally at about 4 pm the decision was made to give him some morphine to help calm him down and ease the pain. He had already signed the paper work for a DNR, and was ready...so we left because my dad did not want to watch that inevitable fate unfold. We headed to my parents that evening, and we all took some cat naps and relaxed. At about 11, we laid down and I was talking to Nancy and Cassie, when at about 12:30 my mom walked into our room in tears to let us know Grandpa Matt had taken his final breaths moments ago and was gone. I hurt to know he was gone, but my hurt was more for my father and his loss. We were never raised close to my grandparents, and I never knew him that well...but I hurt to think of my daddy's pain!
The next morning I woke up and we spent a couple hours looking through old pictures, reminiscing and laughing and getting things together for the funeral and slideshow before I headed home to pick up my little family.
I got home that Sunday and took the girls to see Transylvania 2, because I had promised and I am a firm believe that just because one persons life on earth ends..does not mean we should stop living as well. I was exhausted adn sleep deprived...but I took them anyway and the movie was adorable! I really liked it. We came home and relaxed and planned out our next week. The girls went to school Monday and I packed, put together a slide show and all the funeral music, and ran some errands and when they got out, we headed to my parents. We ate dinner, talked, argued, and went to bed. My moms guest bed hurts my back so I slept horribly and ended up on the couch by the morning time.
The next morning I left with my parents to Waxahachie to work out some issues with the funeral and the luncheon details. We spent the entire day looking for a place to host a luncheon after the funeral, and buying things we needed and all that good fun stuff. Danny and the girls met up with us after lunch...he was being really pissy so I stayed with my parents and we spent some time shopping in old town Waxahachie...it was nice! We all went to check into the hotel at about 3, relaxed for a bit and then by 5 we headed to the funeral home for the wake. We had several people come, but mostly people from my moms side of the family.
After the wake we headed to Braum's for dinned with Tony and Sam and it was delicious. We all called it a night and went to bed after that.
The next morning was the funeral...everyone was in a somber mood..it was not fun and a tad maddening! We ran late because Danny and the girls would not get out of bed...but we made it and that afternoon we buried my Grandpa Matt.
So many people showed up and were there for my parents. I overheard my daddy saying that he had no-one left, and my mom told him, that's not true...you have my whole family...they are your family too and you have your girls and all our grand kids....I know he is hurting...but she was so right. So many people came into town for the funeral from Houston, the valley, and other parts of the state. It made me feel so good that my daddy was surrounded by such a big support system!
After the funeral, we hosted ad picnic at the park for all the people who came out to be with us. Danny was in a pissy mood yet again, and we ended up leaving early. But before we left I got some great pictures with my dad's side of the family!!
We headed home, but stopped at my parents to let traffic die down for a bit, and by 8pm we were back home, ready to get back into the grove of things.
Thursday was a normal day, while we were tired and moody, we all went to work and school, and tried to get back into the routine of daily life. Friday morning I was getting ready for work at 5am, and my phone rang at about 5:20...I thought it was Danny calling to remind me to sign Issy's homework folder, but instead it was Ceci in tears asking me to come to he hospital because Momo was getting taken off her breathing machine and they needed a witness that was not blood related. I left immediately, and got to the hospital to be there with them. I was in shock..I had no idea that her medical issese were this several. I kinda felt guilty for not haven been more helpful and kept track of her progress. Momo passed away at about 7:13 am, and I jumped in and started calling funeral homes and the church, and getting the ball rolling on things. I picked up the girls from school early to break the news, and then went back to Ceci's to do some planning. I went to their appointments with them and helped as much as I could. The girls both cried themselves to sleep over loosing Momo. The next day was a cold dreary and rainy day. We got out and about running errands for the funeral by 10 am, made several stops and got to Ceci's by noon with several cross options, and picture options, and prayer card pages, etc. They needed to get clothes for the funeral so we headed home because Makaila had babysitting plans. We stopped at the thrift store, and sure enough Nina canceled on Makaila for the babysitting (I knew that would happen). Instead we headed back to Ceci's and put toghether some pictures, and worked on the prayer cards. By this time it was raining really bad and started to flood. We ended up having to spend the night! I worked on the slide show and prayer cards and bookmarks, etc. We finished it all up on Sunday morning and then ran a few errands and went to my in-laws to hang out and eat menudo. The kids went to buy a movie and the rest of us just relxed and enjoyed each others company. We made plans for the food after the funeral and I started collecting money and making my to do lists for the week to make sure I could take as much burden from Ceci and Ray as possible.
Monday morning I went to work and was sent to our GP facility to help with an audit...which worked out great because Momo's wake was that afternoon. After work I went to Sam's job to finalize the slide show and then picked up a food tray and headed to the funeral home. After the Rosary, I snuck away and went to buy all the chickens and rolls, and desert for the funeral the next day. We met up at Ceci and Ray's after everything wrapped up to shred the chickens. On Tuesday, October 27 we buried Momo (Petra Ramirez). She was an amazing woman who touched many many hearts!! She will be dearly missed.
Wddnesday we tried to get back to work and into our routine lives. It was fine, but Thursday morning was a whole new story, I went to the GP office to continue working the disaster they had assigned me to at work, and after an hour of being there, the girl I was working with asked me to leave. I was shocked and relieved and mad and happy all at the same time. I came back and my boss was very happy to see me back and for things to have gone the way they did...so that was a relief! At about 1pm I got a call from my sister Erica asking if I had been on facebook or watched the news. I said no, and she proceeded to ell me that my nephew Jose had fallen 60 ft into a loading barge and was being life flighted to Memorial Herman hospital!!! I thought it was a really bad joke, but I confirmed via the internet all the news coverage and the facebook posts and then grabbed my pursed and headed straight to the hospital to be with my sisters to brace the worst!! We sat around waiting for some news and were told he was alive and responsive, but was being x-rayed ad tested..it appeared he had a collapsed lung, some broken ribs, a broken wrist and possibly much more damage. I was shocked to know he was alive...he fell 60 freakin feet!!!! Grateful, and shocked!
Sunday we headed to church and hung out at their Fall festival for a bit. It was so great, and I really do love our church and everything they do for us!! We headed over to Tony and Sam's who had invited us over for lunch and the game. They cooked out and it was delicious!! The Texans actually won. It was the start of a new month, and so I was hopeful for better weeks to come. But also fearful because I've always heard deaths come in 3s...
We stopped for some groceries on our way home and relaxed before getting ready to face our week. On Monday we worked, and when I got home, we relaxed and ate the chili Danny made for dinner which was delicious, and then headed to guitar lessons. Makaila was mad for telling her the harsh truths of life when it came to friendships...she felt I was a bad mother and instead should have just taken her stance on hating the world and being unforgiving and prideful! We ended the night with a few loads of laundry and I wanted the Leah Remini 20/20 special from last week (freaky and quite intriguing!!).
The girls both went to bed but by 10 pm I was feeling very paranoid..I kept hearing things and I was feeling very anxious and worried...I had a such an uneasy feeling in my chest..like I knew something bad was gunna happen. I woke both o the girls up and made them come sleep in my bed abd then called Danny to talk about the gun and the alarm and stuff...he told me that I was probably feeling that way because Chaps was on his last few breathes. My friend and his cousins Brenda and Alexis' dad has been sick for many many years and his time was coming to an end. Sure enough that calmed me down and broke my heart for their pain as well, but by 11:52 he took his last breath and my 3rd death was complete. While my heart hurts for his family, and his children I am also very happy to know that he is at peace, no longer in pain and probably at the gates of heaven dancing like he once loved to do many years ago. RIP Chaps!
Our last few weeks as a family have not been easy and they have included lots and lots of tears...but in the midst of it all I am so grateful for our family, for our togetherness, for our health and unity and love. I am grateful for God's presence in our lives and for all the blessings we received each and every day we wake up. Death is hard and painful, but it is inevitable...we will all die at some point.....I want this blog to remind you girls that life is short and tomorrow is not promised....love each other and remember all the blessings in your life!! Be kind to each other and love each other and others while you can!
Today while I was finishing our updates, Makaila told me her friend Alex found our family blog and has been reading it. I didn't think anyone read this thing...like I said I update it and post so my girls have a place to find happiness when I am gone. I want them to be able to go back and read things and reminisce in to what their lives were and remember how much they are loved....but oddly enough someone has found us entertaining enough to read....so I have included some pictures of Alex (who as far as I know is the only person besides Makaila and Isabella who reads this blog). Hi Alex...hope you enjoy! LOL
Have a great week...maybe I will get it together and post weekly again like was my intention from the beginning!
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