The school has 3,200 students. There is about 1080 students at each lunch!! Basically...they run it on a tight shift. There is no lolligagging in between classes, it's a "walk with a purpose" kinda travel system in between classes for the students. They only have 7 minutes, and in some instances they are traveling a quarter mile from one class to the next...so no chit chat or stopping to visit with a friend..or they will be late!!
I'm a little nervous on how Makaila is going to adjust to this!! I am still ever hopeful that we get a last minute call from Quest! LOL
I left the parents meeting and went straight to the band director to address Makaila. She stopped going to band camp after 3 days. Mainly because I made her choose between Taekwondo and band....but we had not communicated with the band director directly. I talked to him extensively about the time commitment, the money, and the lack of interest from Makaila, yet after an hour of talking to me he still wanted to talk to Makaila. He was adamant that she was talented, and should stick it out! Never mind the fact that I told him, we cannot commit to the time requirements, and cannot afford the required expenses!
I left there with the plan to return in an hour with Makaila in tow. I headed over to Park lakes and picked up Isabella's school supply pack (YEAH!!). I luckily had some cash on me and did not have to wait in the line of 42 people that were waiting to pay with a card! In and out in 5 minutes!! WOHOOO!
I headed back to the High School and texted Makaila and she met me by the band hall. We were early..so we hung out in the hall and took silly pictures instead! LOL
I walked her back to the cafeteria, where she met up with a few of her friends once again, and then I headed back out o the car, once I knew she was going to be okay!!
At this point, I took the next several minutes having a good cry myself!!! High school sucks, and having a daughter going to high school sucks even more!!! I'm scared for her and excited for her, and scared for me all at the same time!! I can still recall walking in hand-in-hand to Jacinto City Elementary (what seems like just yesterday) to see her off to her first day of pre-school!!! Where has the time gone!!! I want my baby girl back. It has been both an honor and a pleasure to watch Makaila grow into the young lady she is today..but it also scares the living daylights out of me.
Thinking back to when I was in school,I thought that I was popular, and "in the know", and fun, and having the time of my life. Looking back there is so much I would have done different, and so much gullibility and nieveness that I am surprised of and mainly grateful for.
In high school, I think I thought I was cool, I thought at the time that I was nice, and that everything was great. I thought at that time that I hung out with a cool group of people and that I was building lasting friendships. Looking back almost 20 years later I realize that I was pretty innocent and nieve about the stuff going on around me. I don't recall ever being exposed to drugs, or sex, or crimes, or peer pressure. And I don't think I was as nice as I should have been! I know I focused on the wrong "friendships" and that while doing the things I did and being the person I was made me who I am today....I'm not fully proud of it all.
I think in a lot of ways Makaila is a much better/ nicer person at her age then I was. That is both a very good and admirable quality...but it is also a weight that sits heavy in my heart. Makaila is a loving and giving person, who tries to please others. As a result she is a fantastic friend, and a good person. Unfortunately those qualities also make her a people pleaser...which means she puts herself last always and undervalues her importance and her feelings!!
I'm scared for this new part of life! I'm scared I won't be able to let my baby go. I'm scared that she will struggle with it. I'm scared that she will change. I'm scared that she won't change. I'm scared her heart will get broken. I'm scared she will break someone's heart. I'm scared that it will go by as fast as all the rest of it has. I'm scared to miss something!! Someone tell me that it gets easier!?!?!? Tell me that I'm crazy...tell me I'm over reacting?!?! Tell me all moms feel this way and I'm not just crazy!!!
After about 20 minutes of loosing it in the car...I headed back home to see Danny and Issy! I got home all puffy eyes and red-faced, but lucky for me they weren't home! They went to buy the stones for or porch!!! WOOHOOO!
I helped Danny unload the stones when he got home and then we went to Firehouse Subs for lunch!! It was yummy! I'm not much of a sandwich gal...but it was yummy!!
As we were leaving, Makaila called and was ready to get picked up. We got her and Miranda (her cousin who will be a freshman with her this year!!), and got them some lunch.
I headed over to Galena Park because I ordered Isabella's party invitations online at Sam's - but since I don't have a Sam's card...my sister-in-law, Ceci picked them up for me!! They turned out fantastic! I was pretty excited. We headed back home and did a little cleaning before heading to Henderson's for family class! I registered us for testing on Saturday morning, and got in a last round of training!! On the way home, Makaila read to me an e-mail she wrote to Mr. Wolf about having disappointed him by quitting band. If I thought I had heartache on Friday afternoon..Friday night was more of the same!! I cried while she read her e-mail to me because once again, her heart is just too big!!
Her e-mail to him was heartfelt and kind and brought me to tears. She explained to him that our family could financially not afford to do both Taekwondo and band and how as the older sibling, she has to help with her sister and could not commit to the time requirements of being in the marching band. She told him how she was sorry to disappoint him and that she was grateful for having had him as a teacher, That he was an inspiration and a teacher she would never forget!
As a parent, I felt horrible for not being able to give Makaila everything, but she was absolutely right...we can't afford both! I hate to have to rely on her to watch Issy so much.....but as two working parents....what choice do we have!?!? I'm so proud of her for understanding and not pushing us or whining or complaining...but just being the calm and giving person she is and going with the flow of life, accepting that while we can't give her everything she is grateful for what we can give her!!! Yet another example of how awesome she is and how grown-up she is!! She makes us such proud parents!!
Friday night, we just kinda hung out while Danny and his dad started on our porch!! They worked their tails off and got a big portion of it done! My mother-in-law and I went and picked up some dinner and we all ate together after they wrapped up for the night. I got to cleaning out our pantry and they headed home. Danny and Makaila went to get a few things at Wal-Mart while Issy and I organized and cleaned out our pantry! We filled up 3 trash bags of crap that was old or just plain unnecessary!!!
Finally at Midnight I headed to bad. Danny was aching all over so I gave him a massage and then went to bed!
Saturday morning I woke up early and did a couple loads of laundry. Finally at 9, I woke up Issy and Makaila and got ready to head to Henderson's for our testing. Issy did fantastic. I however messed up on my form, on the bags and in my self-defense. I don't know what my problem was! I knew my stuff I just kept messing up! We will see on Monday what I get!!!
After testing, we headed home to shower and get ready. We met my sister Sam over off Harwin to do some quinceanera shopping!! We spent the next couple hours in and out of shops...but we had Issy with us which meant there was a ton of whining, and crying and complaining because that kid thinks the world revolves around her and insists on trying on 15 dresses at each shop because in her mind she needs to be the focus of attention! (She is so much like her daddy!!! LOL)
Makaila tried on a few different dresses....
and we even found a crown that we liked (we bought it - knowing that if we found something else we like better later its no big deal! My sister Sam signed up tot give her the crown...so she bought it and we were pretty excited!!)
then we finally gave up!! We headed instead over to Memorial City mall to do some window shopping and eat!! We had lunch at Berryhill, and then walked around the mall for awhile. We looked at dresses in Dillard's and Cache, and Camille's.
Camille's was very promising. She even tried on another dress for herself there, while my sister and I tried on dresses for us!!!
I tried on 4 different dresses myself and fell in love with one!! It was exactly what I had in mind for myself!! It was pretty, lacy, high colored (no cleavage issues), fitted but not skin tight, and just all around classy!
I didn't look pregnant, or fat, or short or any of the other thoughts that came to mind earlier in the day when trying things on!!
I won't show you the dress because ------ I bought it! Yes - I know...it is crazy to buy a dress almost a whole year ahead of time...but it was just perfect and it was on sale and I couldn't pass it up!! I am very pleased with my choice. I even sent Danny a picture of me wearing it and he liked it too!!! Of course I got the eye roll when he saw that I went ahead and bought it...but he didn't complain...so I guess I'm okay!!!
After we wrapped up shopping I took the girls to Ceci and Ray's to watch the Texans game. We don't really watch football, but it's always nice to hang out with family. The kids played and we all hung out having good laughs.
I was falling asleep at about 10, so we headed home. I hung out with the girls watching tv and folding clothes until about 12 and then went to bed!!
Sunday morning, I woke up early again, and did some more laundry and watched some of the tv shows I had recorded from the weekdays! I love me some Micheal and Kelly and some Ellen!
I woke the girls up at 9 and Issy was in a pissy mood. She was real close to getting her butt whopped before church!! She was testing my patience like none other!! She cried and got dressed and we headed to church. Rose and Jade and the Ramirez clan all joined us....I love that!
Pastor Kerry is back and the message was great! Here are my notes:
Church Notes:
BULLSEYE - Focusing on the one thing that changes everything!
To go from clouded to clarity ask your self this:
1. Is it worth my one and only life?
Focus on the principle of priority! If the choice to be made distracts you from what is your priority....then it isn't a choice you should make!
"Live life, then with a due sense of responsibility, not as men who do not know the meaning of life but as those who do: Vs. 15 (Phil)
The purpose of life is the RELATIONSHIP! Prioritize your relationships! 1. God 2. Your marriage 3. Your children 4. Your church/Family 5. the rest of the world
(Notice this doesn't prioritize your job, or your clubs, or social acceptance!
2. Is it a divine opportunity or a beautiful distraction? Focus : The principle of Discernment
You have to layout your priorities and stay on target. There are a lot of good opportunities, but only a handful of God opportunities!
3. Does it make me come alive or cause me to die a little each day?
Focus: The principle of Alignment.
Don't worry about missing out on things...life is too short.....do the things that make you better and happier!
4. Will it bring me closer to Christ or take me farther away from Christ? Focus: The principle of One Thing
The one things is growing in Christ!
Now is the only time we know we have....stop putting things off and seek God!
Don't just be content with seeing or hearing about God's work - experience it...live it!!
To seek the clarity in your life you need to create, build and nourish a relationship with God!!
Once we left church, the girls and I headed to Denny's to eat with the Ramirez clan!! I love the kids getting to hang out together and the families becoming closer by spending time together at church and spending time together in good spirits afterwards!!!
We made a pit stop at Dollar Tree, and then the kids came back to the house to pick up some clothes and leave me!! My plan of spending the rest of the day cleaning house and doing laundry didn't appeal to them, so they went home with Ceci and Ray!
I literally spent the rest of the afternoon doing laundry and watching tv, and sweeping the floors and more laundry! I watched some of the little league world series with Danny before he headed to work and then continues with more laundry! Finally at about 7, I got some real clothes on and headed to Target to get some "goody bag stuff". Didn't find much or have much enthusiasm either...so i went back home instead!
I watched a little more tv...finished the last of all the laundry and then went to bed early!
It was 10:45 and I couldn't sleep so I decided to text Danny the following:
"I'm lying here in bed trying to fall asleep....but I can't stop thinking about you! You should know that I think you are fantastic! I'm so proud of you as a father, as a husband, and as a person. I love you more than words can say!!"
Unfortunately...my phone never lets me text when I am inside my house! It's a hunk of junk!!! In order to text I have to stand in the doorway, one leg in the air...phone held high in my right hand and screen light on in order for it to send...and that's only if I'm lucky!! Most times if my phone rings (on the rare occasion that the call goes through)...I have to answer it and go outside...or the line will hang up! LOL
Anyway...I tried to send it to him about 5 times before I finally gave up. So Dan if you read this later...know that I really wanted to send you that message.....my phone just would not cooperate!!
I watched one more episode of the Leah Remini Show on TLC....hilarious....and just FYI...If anyone were ever to play me in a movie it would be her!!!!! I'm not nearly as gorgeous as she is...but man I think her and I could be the best of friends!!!
That was our weekend rewind! One more week before school starts...make sure you make some lasting memories this week and remind your kids of how special they are and how loved they are!!! Even when they seem to have it all together.....everyone wants to be loved!!
We hope you have a great week...and prioritize your life....put God first!! Remember to say a little prayer at the start of your day! My prayer each morning these days is.."God help me to watch the words that come out of my mouth....help me to think before I speak, and choose my words carefully that they may be pleasing to you!"
I asked God to help Danny find a good job where he would be happy, and in return I would stop cursing.....he hasn't gotten a better job just yet...but I am making an effort to consciously start on my promise anyway...cause I have faith that his answers are coming...and I need to crawl before I can walk....so pray for me too!! If you know me...then you know it isn't an easy task!!!
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